Castle Zine Update, a Drawing and Rambling

The castle zine is coming along! I recently laid out and printed a mock-up of it. It contains all my observational castle drawings from France. It’s titled… Castles. I’m going to be printing up final copies this week.

This photo is so-so until you notice my eyes on the bottom of it.

Now, a drawing and a rambling:

I don’t understand my mood swings right now. I can be incredibly depressed, agonizingly, crumpled to the floor sobbing; or I can feel really good, talking to people and feeling generally positive and bubbly. I have a theory: I’ve always categorized myself as an optimistic person. I look on the bright side of situations, and I genuinely like a variety of things. I’m critical and judgmental, yes, but not negative. But I’m terrifically bummed out right now. I think your early twenties are meant to be a struggle: finding your own two feet, carving niches, yadda yadda yadda. I’m having a hard time. So I think, situationally, I feel awful. I’m not thriving and it’s difficult. And yet, through all this gloomy netherworld I find myself emotionally in, my true personality continues to shine through. It’s getting chaotic; I’m agape at times, with how happy I am, and I think, “Was I really so sad yesterday? How is that possible?” And when the sadness hits, I can’t understand how I could feel happy again. But I remember it all, and I remember happiness comes, even if I have no clue what it is.

I suppose this is all good, really. Struggle is struggle. I’m thankful for where I am, and I look forward to where I’m going. Ah well. I’m writing this in a good mood. Catch me tomorrow, we’ll see how I am.

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